This changes at 35 but no one mentions it

Sometime after 35, something begins to feel different. Not dramatically. Not in a way that demands a doctor’s appointment. Just a quiet shift.

Energy becomes less predictable. A late night lingers longer. Stress feels heavier than it used to. You can still do everything you’ve always done but it costs you more. Most people explain it away with a shrug: “That’s just ageing.” But ageing, on its own, doesn’t tell the whole story. There is a subtle recalibration happening beneath the surface, one that affects both men and women.

It has far more to do with stress physiology, muscle mass, sleep architecture and metabolic flexibility than simply the passing of time.

From our mid-thirties onwards, the body begins to prioritise efficiency over excess.

In your twenties, the system is forgiving. You can override fatigue. You can under-sleep. You can push through stress and recover quickly. After 35, recovery becomes less automatic.

Stress hormones remain elevated a little longer. Deep sleep becomes slightly lighter. Muscle mass gradually declines if it isn’t deliberately maintained. Blood sugar becomes more sensitive to disrupted sleep or skipped meals.

None of this is dramatic enough to trigger alarm bells. But collectively, these shifts change your baseline. This is why the same routine that once left you energised now leaves you wired, tired or depleted. The body hasn’t failed you. It has simply become less tolerant of chronic strain.

When Stress Stops “Bouncing Back”

One of the first things people notice in this stage of life is that stress no longer rolls off as easily.

In earlier decades, cortisol rises and falls efficiently. The nervous system activates and deactivates with relative ease. Over time, especially after years of responsibility and pressure, the stress response can become more reactive and slower to settle.

You might notice:

• Feeling alert at night but fatigued during the day.

• Waking in the early hours with a racing mind.

• Greater irritability over small things.

• A shorter fuse for chaos or noise.

• A sense of being “on” even when nothing urgent is happening.

This is not weakness. It is accumulated load.

For many adults, mid-life is not the beginning of stress, it is the continuation of decades of it. Careers, care giving, financial demands, emotional labour, the nervous system has been active for years.

Eventually, it asks for regulation instead of endurance.

The Muscle You Didn’t Realise You Were Losing

Another quiet shift that rarely makes casual conversation is the gradual loss of muscle mass.

From around 35 onwards, adults can lose several percentage points of muscle per decade if they are not intentionally preserving it. And because this happens slowly, most people do not notice until their metabolism feels different.

Muscle is not just about strength or appearance. It is metabolically protective tissue. It improves insulin sensitivity. It helps regulate blood sugar. It supports bone density. It plays a role in inflammatory balance. It contributes to mood stability through complex signalling pathways between muscle and brain.

When muscle declines, the body becomes less metabolically flexible. Energy dips feel sharper. Weight distribution can shift. Recovery from illness or training takes longer.

This is why strength training transitions from optional to essential after 35, not for aesthetics, but for resilience.

The Sleep Conversation

Sleep also changes in subtle but important ways.

Deep restorative sleep, the phase responsible for cellular repair and hormone regulation, often decreases with age. Stress compounds this.

Even small elevations in evening cortisol or overnight blood sugar fluctuations can fragment sleep cycles. You may still spend enough hours in bed, yet wake feeling less restored.

Poor sleep then feeds back into the system:

• It worsens blood sugar regulation.

• It increases appetite and cravings.

• It heightens pain sensitivity.

• It reduces emotional tolerance.

• It clouds cognitive clarity.

The result is a loop that feels like “ageing” but is often unaddressed physiology.

Trying harder rarely fixes it. Calming the system does.

Why Doing More Isn’t the Answer

When energy dips or weight shifts, many adults respond the only way they know how: with more effort.

More intense workouts. More restriction. Less food. More caffeine. Longer hours.

But the body after 35 responds differently to intensity.

It responds to rhythm.

Where youth rewards pushing, midlife rewards consistency. Where earlier decades tolerate chaos, this stage favours regulation.

The nervous system becomes less impressed by extremes and more responsive to predictability.

Regular meals that stabilise blood sugar. Strength sessions that preserve lean mass. Gentle daily movement that promotes circulation. Consistent sleep timing. Brief moments of deliberate down-regulation.

These are not dramatic interventions. They are foundational patterns.

And when implemented consistently, they create profound shifts.

Adaptation, Not Decline

It is tempting to interpret these changes as deterioration.

But a more accurate lens is adaptation. The body is recalibrating in response to accumulated stress and the passage of time. It is becoming more sensitive to inputs, both positive and negative.

That sensitivity can feel inconvenient if you continue living as though you are 25.

But it becomes empowering when you work with it.

People who align their habits with this stage often report:

• More stable energy across the day.

• Clearer thinking.

• Improved mood regulation.

• Better recovery from exercise.

• Reduced inflammatory aches and pains.

• A deeper sense of steadiness.

Not because they became stricter. But because they became more strategic.

The Deeper Shift

After 35, resilience becomes less about how much you can tolerate and more about how well you recover.

It becomes less about endurance and more about integration.

Your vitality increasingly depends on:

How well you sleep.
How consistently you nourish your body.
How intentionally you preserve muscle.
How often you regulate your stress response.
How much recovery you allow.

This is not about slowing down your ambitions or shrinking your life.

It is about upgrading your approach.

When you honour this shift rather than resist it, something unexpected happens.

Energy becomes steadier. Strength becomes more meaningful. Calm becomes more accessible. Health feels less like a battle and more like a partnership.

Midlife is not a decline.

It is a biological request for wiser inputs.

And when you respond accordingly, you often discover that vitality after 35 can feel more grounded, more stable and more sustainable than it ever did before.

Until next time remember… ageing is inevitable, but depletion is not. Your body is not failing you.

It is adapting. When you meet that adaptation with strength, nourishment and recovery, vitality does not fade with age, it evolves.

The information provided in this newsletter is for general guidance and educational purposes only. It is not a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always consult with a healthcare professional before making significant changes to your health and wellness routine.

Wishing you good health,

The Wellness Valet Team

Recipe of the Week: Thai Coconut Chicken with Lime and Basil

Ingredients:

• 500g free-range chicken thighs, sliced

• 1 tbsp coconut oil

• 3 cloves garlic, finely chopped

• 1 tbsp fresh ginger, grated

• 1 red chilli, finely sliced (optional)

• 1 tbsp Thai red curry paste (quality, minimal additives)

• 1 can full-fat coconut milk

• 1 tbsp fish sauce

• Juice of 1 lime

• 1 red capsicum, sliced

• 1 cup green beans, trimmed

• 1 small courgette, sliced

• Large handful fresh Thai basil

• Fresh coriander to serve

Method

• Heat coconut oil in a large pan over medium heat.

• Add garlic, ginger and chilli. Sauté gently until fragrant.

• Stir in curry paste and cook for 1–2 minutes to release flavours.

• Add sliced chicken and cook until lightly browned.

• Pour in coconut milk and fish sauce. Simmer gently for 10–12 minutes.

• Add vegetables and cook until just tender but still vibrant.

• Finish with lime juice and stir through Thai basil.

Serve with brown jasmine rice or cauliflower rice for a lower glycaemic option

Fragrant, gently spiced and rich in healthy fats, this dish supports metabolic resilience while delivering proper flavour. The combination of protein, fibre and healthy fats keeps blood sugar steady especially helpful after 35 when energy regulation becomes more sensitive.